It’s been two weeks and one day since starting my Weight Watchers journey. It’s been a good experience. It’s been easier than I thought it would be. I love the app and counting my points, surprisingly. I feel encouraged by my progress and my ability to stick with it for two weeks. I’m happy to say I’ve not “cheated” once on the diet. I’ve not had processed sugar or fast food or anything bad like that.
Yet, I had the opportunity to be crushed with disappointment yesterday. The scale I had been weighing myself with was a very old one. One of those that isn’t digital, I can’t think of the name it’s called. But you know, the old school kind that aren’t digital. I knew it could be off, but I still went ahead and used it for the first two weeks. It showed that I was about 213. I was so excited I’d gone from 220 to 213. And then I stepped on the digital scale. A very nice one. One that I trust is correct. And that scale said, 221.
I was crushed. I was a pound heavier than when I even started, according to this new scale. It did play with my emotions for the night. I didn’t feed those emotions with food though. I woke up renewed emotionally. I realized, so what if I was five pounds heavier at the start of the diet than I first realized. So what?! I will just lose an extra five pounds to make my goal weight. No biggie. I can do that.
I weighed myself in the morning and it said 219. I had totally forgotten yesterday that I’d been weighing myself in the morning, not afternoon! And even though that wasn’t the 213 I thought I was, it was less than the 221 that it read yesterday afternoon.
Honestly, weight shouldn’t matter this much. If I know I’m losing it in inches, than pounds shouldn’t matter all that much. But they do. When you’re this fat, it matters. I know I’ll lose it though. I’m determined this time around. It feels much like the last time I quit smoking over a decade ago. That day, I just knew in my heart I was going to be able to quit. And I did. Same with this weight loss journey. I’m going to make it. One foot in front of the other. One step at a time. One inch, one pound, one dress size. I’ll get there.
So, now I’m saying my starting weight was 224. Week one loss was 5 pounds. Nothing in week two. Which, I’m sure there may have been a pound or two, but I don’t want to say that if I don’t know for sure. And it’s really okay with me to think that I might not have lost anything. It doesn’t mess with my head. Pinky swear. So I’m starting week two at 219 pounds. My first goal is to get under 200 pounds. When I hit 199 I’m going to freak out, in the very best way! My ultimate goal is to get to 145-150 pounds – where I was before getting Lyme disease – my healthy weight. A long way to go, but I’m setting more attainable goals as I go along.
I can do this!